Our mam's dead.
Hey. Hey. Hey Anthony come here. Anthony, Damian, come here.
Ok. Team talk.
Your mother,
She would not want you,
to stand around crying or to steal things.
She wants you to get on with your lives
and do the best you can.
Make her proud, son, eh?
And not, you know... cry.
Ok. So let's stop crying eh?
And stealing things. Let's stop that too.
Get in the car.
Don't ever do that to me again.
Look. I'm really sorry it was me.
I didn't mean to cause any trouble or anything.
No you did right. They stole it, what could you do?
They did give it to a good cause.
I wouldn't have done that at their age.
They must be... you did a good job.
Thanks.
Are you from the social?
No. I'm just a visitor.
I go round the schools collecting for this water thing.
And try and tell them about the change over, you know.
Making sure that the kids understand it.
Does anyone understand it?
Sometimes they are a bit confused, until I talk to them.
And then...
They're really confused.
I'm sorry. They're very sorry.
I've sent them to bed.
I want you to know that it won't happen again.
Do you mind me asking how you came to have
so much cash in the house?
It was a donation. It was left here anonymously.
And you weren't suspicious about that?
No, we pray a lot and
we thought it was the answers to our prayers.
Only it has been mentioned that you spent close
to five thousand pounds in Comet...
A few days ago.
Digital television. Mircowave oven.
Dishwasher. Foot spa.
Did you actually pray for all of these things?
We were praying for comfort and encouragement.
I think we felt comforted and encouraged.
By the foot spa?
And the dishwasher.
Samaritans. Oxfam.
Christian Aid.
For Christ's sake, don't tick them little boxes.
The ones about putting you in touch with like-minded organisations.
You'll be besieged man. I'm telling you!
Saint Peter, died AD sixty four.
Alright, don't remind us.
The money... it's robbed.
I know.
Patron Saint of keys, locks and general security, man.
Including up there. I'm on the door.
Is it still alright, if it's robbed?
Can you still do good with it or should you give it back?
I thought it was a miracle, but it is just robbed.
Damian. Listen.
One day I was with you know who, Jesus.
And he went up into the mountains and thousands of people followed him.
The police said five thousand, five thousand.
Everybody knows this story.
Loaves and fishes.
See, I knew you'd say that. That's what everybody says.
This yours?
It's the key to the old house.
Jointed pin tumbler Engineering perfection.
Anyway, this kid comes up to us, about your size,
His name was... no I have forgotten.
I still see him sometimes.
Anyway he comes up with these loaves and fishes.
Sardines.
And Jesus blesses them and passes the plate round.
Now the first person he passes it to, passes it on.
He doesn't take anything.
He just passes it on. Do you know why?
Because he had a piece of lamb hidden in his pocket.
And as he is passing the fish, he sneaks a bit of meat out
and pretends he's taken it off the plate.
Do you see what I'm saying?
And the next person exactly the same story.
Every single bastard one of them has their own food.
And every one of them is keeping it quiet.
Looking after number one.
But as that plate went round with the sardines on
They all got their own food out and started to share.
And then that plate went all the way round
And back to Jesus
and it'd still got the fish and the loaves on it.
I think Jesus was a bit taken aback.
He says, 'what happened? '
And I just said 'miracle'.
And at first I thought I'd fooled him.
But now I see it was a miracle, one of his best.
But this little kid had stood up and...
Everybody there just got bigger.
Do you understand what I'm talking about?
Not really.
I'm talking about you.
Now I'm really lost.
You're trying too hard.
That kid he wasn't planning on doing a miracle.
He wasn't planning anything, except lunch.
Something that looks like a miracle turns out to be dead simple.
But what am I going to do with all this?
I just want to be good.
Look I can't say too much about this,
because of that whole free will thing.
Right?
But...
see this key? Keep it safe. Alright?
And I'll have a word upstairs...
See if I can get somebody on your case more permanent.
It's three days left to e-day, my true love said to me.
Convert your change or donate to charity.
Huummmmm, marvellous.
There are just three days left to e-day.
Remember the money in your bank account has already been converted.
The easiest way to change any cash you have
is to pay it into your account.
The Sterling becomes Euros the moment it's paid in.
And if you don't have an account, why not open one today?
Can I help you at all?
We'd like to open a bank account.
- Is your mum and dad with you? - No.
Well I need an adult signature. I need proof of who you are.
Oh we thought of that. Leisure pass.
I'm afraid you're going to have to ask your mum to come in.
This isn't enough. Just ask your mum to come in.
- We can't. - Why not?
Our mam's dead.
There's two free euros in here
And you can keep the rest of your money in it.
It's the best I can do.
I told you. We should have bought a house.
Right if we can't hide it, at least we can spend it.
- Hello. - Now that is quality.
That is amazing. I can see you. Can you see me?
Yeah.
Not here, on there.
Not as well.
I can see you in mine. This is fantastic.
Anthony.
Why don't we give the money to the lady with the bin?
It's not ours and we're never going to spend it all.
She could do good with it.
We just gave her a grand and look at the trouble it caused.
And if we gave her two hundred we'll end up in jail.
We're on our own now Damian. Don't let me down.
Hello. The speaker went on the bin.
Your dad said he'd fix it. So I said I'd cook for him.
So you get a decent meal for once.
I'm a fantastic cook. Aren't I a fantastic cook, Damian?
The size of that school bag.
You'll give yourselvesa hernia, is that all homework?
- No. - Yeah.
Er, costumes for the nativity play. I suppose it is homework really.
I love a nativity play, can I see them?
- Yeah. - No.
It's private. Private property... of the school.
It will spoil the surprise.
Am I going to go too?
Are you going to get me some tickets?
Well I suppose so.
Well I didn't even know they were in it.
I get told nothing you know, nothing.
Are you going to come and do some chopping?
It's lasagne, your favourite.
Where was the highwaymanan, Dick Turpin,
hanged in seventeen thirty nine?
- York. - How did you know that?
- It's York. - Glasgow... Carlisle...
He knows everything your dad.
- Norwich... York... - Why don't you go on it,
you'd be great, wouldn't he, he'd be great.
Fifty fifty please.
It's York!
You'd be a lot less frustrated if you went on yourself.
Damian, tell him to go on.
You'd like to have a million pounds wouldn't you?
It's not a million pounds. It's a million euros.
That's only about...
Six hundred and twenty three thousand,
one hundred pounds at today's prices.
At least somebody has been listening.
Told you it was York.
Jim, I'm so sorry the answer is York.
We're supposed to go to bed when this is finished.
Yeah right, go to bed.
But you're supposed to read us a story.
- I'll get off. - I'll see you out.
I'll see you out too.
I know.
Come again soon.
- Sucker for women. - Sucker for men.
Don't forget I want to seethat nativity play. Your dad'llforget.
Go and get your pyjamas on.
They're good lads.
Nice to have someone to talk to once in a while, though.
Yeah. Thanks. I had a great evening.
I know what she's after.
We can't leave it here.
We're going to have tokeep it with us...
all the time.
Fill your school bag.
And don't let it out your sight.
Guard it with your life, whatever happens.
- Ok? - Ok.
Damian?
Have you any room?
- Have youany room? - No, Damian,
Damian he's tired, he's walked here all the way from Nazareth.
He's tired. He's very, very tired.
- Well... - Tired.
The walk fromNazareth, people did that all the time.
And he was a carpenter. So he was very fit.
He wasn't tired. He was excited.
His wife was going to have a baby.
They weren't expecting to go to sleep.
Ok. You say excited. I say tired. Let's try nervous?
Ok? Shall we start again?
Joseph the Worker, first century, dates uncertain?
I wouldn't have said nervous. I would have said focused.
Well, have you any room?
What did he want to bring her for?
You invited her.
Beginners. Beginners positions.
Damian, come on.
The word went out from Julius Caesar.
Caesar...
Caesar Augustus that everybody
had to go to their home town to be taxed.
So Mary and Joseph set out for Bethlehem.
# Little Donkey, # Little Don. Key.
# On the dusty road...
Do you know how much a piece of gold that big
would be worth at today's prices?
A lot. An awful lot. I wonder what happened to it?
Because he was poor after that. I wonder what he spent it on.
Can we please loose the anachronistic bag?
I don't think they had Addidas in the first century.
Far away to the East, three wise men saw a star.
Thanks girls.
Look a star!
Let's follow it.
# Come, they told me, # par um pa pa pa pum
# A new born King to see, # par um pa pum pum
No, Saint Maureen.
I don't think I have heard of her. Is she a virgin martyr?
I don't think so.
Here he is.
He's always got those bags with him.
Pom pom pom...
Do you remember me?
Mmmm...?
I'm the poor man.
Damian Cunningham, what are you doing there?
Come on, where should you be?
Where should you be, you should be in Bethlehem,
come on.
I can't believe you've got... no go back... go back.
As for these.
What have I told you about these?
I've told you before. Ssshhhhh.
Back out! Back out! Back out!
Shhhhh! Back on! Back on!
They tried first at one inn.
Do you have any room at this inn?
No sorry, we're fully booked.
Do you have any room at this inn?
We haven't any room, but we've got a stable.
So he took them to the stable...
Oh, this is nice and cosy, Joseph...
and cosy Joseph...
I said this is nice and cosy Joseph.
Damian? Damian?
Yes, this is where our Lord Baby Jesus will be born.
And so our Saviour came, bringing peace to all the earth.
# Silent night, Holy night...
Quick, come on!
You stay there.
Oh no the keys!
Oh no!
Damian!
- What you doing? - Dad!
Come here! Oh God!
Come here! Come here! It's alright.
Let's get you down. What were you doing?
- Is he all right, Dad? - There we go,
- What's he doing? - Good lad.
Well he found it!
Ltjust fell out of the sky. Right in front of me.
I thought it was from God.
From God?
It's not really his thing is it, handing out cash?
Why would God hand out...
Two hundred and twenty nine thousand, three hundred and twenty pounds.
Blimey!
I was going to give it to the poor, but it was really hard.
Why didn't you tell me?
Anthony said not to, because of the tax.
We could keep some of it though couldn't we, like a reward?
- Get in. - Oh!
So what are we going to do with it then?
We're going to hand it in. All of it.
Well what else can we do? It's not ours is it?
Hello?
I called round, the door was open. I've called the police.
I thought you might have come home.
Everyone gets burgled at Christmas, Dad.
This will be your crime number.
So you can get on to your insurance company.
Of course they can't really recompense you for this.
I mean they can't give you your Christmas back can they?
Probably be next Christmas by the time you get anything back.
I don't suppose you've got any serial numbers, security codes,
anything like that? No?
Well, wouldn't make any difference.
It's very rare we get anything back. Very rare.
Whe know the stolen currency is around here somewhere.
That's what this is all about.
But they can't do anything about it.
All the banks have been warned to look out
for anyone making any large deposits.
And of course, it's only one day or two,
before they realise that the money is worthless.
What's that?
It's nothing, it's nothing. It's just my stuff.
Oh dad, don't.
Oh my God!
This is what they were after.
That's a lot of money. Where did it come from?
They took our Christmas. We'll take their cash.
- You can't keep it. - You're going to keep it?
It belongs to the government.
They were going to burn it.
They were going to burn all this money,
that's a crime if you ask me.
- Definitely. - But stealing is wrong.
If you steal something, you have to steal it from somebody.
Who would we be stealing it from?
It's not right!
Damian, my house has just been ransacked.
I work every second God sends just to cover the mortgage,
to give you a decent home.
And now it's been wrecked.
I am owed this.
- But Da... - Go to bed.
Now!
- Do you want a story? - It's wrong.
- Who says? - God.
Yeah, well.
Yeah, well what?
- Don't you want to go to heaven? - Look around you, Damian.
We're on our own.
No one is smiling down on us Damian.
No one is is looking out for us.
So we're looking out for ourselves.
- But mam... - Is dead.
She's dead, Damian.
You'll never see her again. And neither will I.
And the money, is ours.
We'll take it to town tomorrow and change it and spend it,
do you hear me?
All of it, because it's ours.
I know you've got it. It's mine.
And you're going to change it tomorrow.
And that's a good thing. Ok?
When you come back.
I'm going to call you on this phone.
Open the front door. Let me in.
And we'll take the money.
And you won't have to worry about it any more.
Understand?
You make sure your phone's switched on.
...fifteen.
You take one side and we'll take the other and then swap.
- All right. - Ok change what you can
and what you can't change spend.
Have a ball!
You do realise, you just kissed goodbye to the money.
Come on let's get cracking.
She's going to run off with it, you must know that?
- Come on! - How can she, she's got Damian?
She'll kidnap him, hold him to ransom for the rest of the money.
No, Anthony, that's what you'd do. Come on.
Ok, you wait here all right?
It's mine.
We'll have to change more than this.
- No! - What?
That's the whole point,
do it in small amounts and no one will be suspicious.
Look at the queue. Look at the time.
We'll be lucky to get round three banks at this rate.
You'll be lucky to stay out the jail.
- Go on! - What?
It's just quite a lot in the circumstances.
It's five thousand quid.
It's the front half of a Ford Fiesta.
Is this a bank or a sweet shop?
- What? - I need a wee.
Tell her that.
Can I use your loo?
- Well I'm not sure... - Well I'm not queuing up again,
the poor kid's been in here half an hour.
You must have a loo?
What do you do when you need to go?
Ok, just this once.
You'll have to go here.
I don't really need one.
You little belter.
I just can't see why it's so difficult.
I need a wee.
It's the front half of a Ford Fiesta, as far as I'm concerned, that's...
I need a wee. I need a wee.
Today's the day, that Britain enters a new currency era.
You must spend or bank any remaining old money today.
It's now or never. Use it or lose it.
At midnight tonight, it's euros only for British business.
Well if you say so for business... business is... now what was your name.
- What? - I've got an idea.
- What? - Dollars.
Change it into dollars now and change it into euros whenever.
Actually once all the excitement's over
the euro will most likely drop in value.
So we'll probably get a better exchange rate this way too.
- What? - Where did I get you?
They've got a bank in there. It stays open late.
You know everything, you do, don't you?
Yeah.
What's wrong?
How did you know about the bank?
Is this where your mum worked? In here?
Well stay there then.
You'll be alright. I'll come straight back for you.
I'll do this one. Ok?
Don't look.
This is where your mum used to work.
Nice.
Best get a move on, huh?
Go on.
Damian? What you doing?
Hey, what's up?
Did you think I'd run off and left you?
Did you?
Well I didn't, did I?
No, you didn't.
- The bank's upstairs. - It's closed.
And I've had a much better idea. Come on.
Let's go and stuff our faces.
Oh I could have had my eye out.
Where are the glasses?
Damian, wants to give his to the poor.
Do you?
Of course they won't be poor anymore, once you've given it to them.
What'll do you do then, take it back?
Speaking of which...
Right mystery activity... champagne.
...follow me.
A woman opens the door in her nightie
and I thought funny place to keep a door...
- This is your fault this. - What is?
You don't even know, do you?
You brought her and you don't even know.
What are you on about?
Can you hear them laughing?
Even he's laughing. Listen.
Very good.
Once she's got what she came for, she'll piss off again.
Then he won't be laughing will he?
It will all start again like when mam died.
- He'll be angry... - Maybe... she, you know,
she won't, she'll stay.
Oh great! Much better. Is that what you want?
Her in there with him instead of mam?
Why are you angry with me?
Because you did it. You and your weird stuff.
Chucking money away. Talking to yourself. Seeing things.
I don't. I mean maybe I do, but...
And me! Sticking up for you.
For what? The truth is, you're a loony!
Don't say that, Anthony. Please don't say that!
You're just a fucking loony and you should be locked up.
Be at the front door with the money in ten minutes.
Damian! We were... I was just...
Dad, don't answer it.
- Dad don't. - What is going on.
Please!
See this little girls. My girls.
These girls Santa Claus forgot. You're our last hope.
We haven't got a heater home.
Because no point going back if you don't help
...took it out. - Just...
- Who is it? - Excuse me please.
Wheelchair like these need your help.
Fifty percent of families
with a chronically ill child, break up.
You're maybe asking yourself
why these Waterloo station need friends.
Oh, Let me explain.
This is a mid of night. This is a privat time.
Who are you?
Get out please. Get mind. Just leaving.
Go on, you and your... get out.
- Come on - Two euro's a month...
- It's absolutely... - Would you be prepared
to consider a direct debit.
Just shut up, will you?
Damian? Damian?
This is that same donkey as he looks after
just a few months in our sanctuary.
- I think you'll agree... - All right love. Put him down.
Shall we?
You'd better tell me how this started?
I've no idea.
Some one must have said something strange.
Digital?
Yeah that's right, yeah.
How do you find it? I'm yet to be convinced.
Well you can come and have a look, when you get rid of that lot.
Mmm. One step at a time, eh?
Any chance of a bit of toast?
You do that, I'll have a look around.
Evening, lad.
You.
- Where is he? - I don't know.
- Ha? Where is he? - Upstairs.
Peaceful isn't it?
Who are you?
Who am I?
Who are you?
We're the police.
Oh.
I know you're only a dream. But I don't care.
It's nice to see you. Even if you're just a dream.
The money just makes everything worse.
I've got something for you.
From Readers Digest. Here.
You may have already won ten thousand pounds.
Please will you talk to me?
Five minutes. Ok?
Now, don't interrupt. I'm dead.
I know what I'm talking about, ok?
You need to use conditioner on your hair.
Your dad won't think of that, but it makes all the difference.
Me?
You are not to worry about me.
You have been worrying about me, haven't you?
I'm fine.
Anthony.
He seems to have taken it better than you.
But he hasn't.
He's got a good heart, he just...
he doesn't know where it is.
Damian?
He's going to need you. Be good to him.
Dad doesn't believe.
Doesn't believe what?
Any of it. Anything. He mustn't do or he wouldn't.
Couldn't you talk to him?
- He can't see me. - Oh.
Is it because of the money?
In a way. The money makes it harder to see what's what.
You know that already.
Never really win with those things anyway.
You just end up with books about
the building of the American Railways.
It's her isn't it?
Your dad and her?
Damian.
You know how complicated the money was?
Well... people are even more complicated.
You need to remember
that there is nearly always enough good around to be going on with.
You've just got to have a bit of faith, you know.
And if you've got faith in people that makes them stronger.
And you, you've got enough to sort all three of you out.
Hey? That's why I'm counting on you.
I haven't really been worried about you.
I've just been missing you.
That's allowed.
Are you really a Saint?
Well, the criteria's very strict.
It's notjust a case of doing good and all that.
You do have to do an actual miracle.
So...
I'm in there. Course I am.
What was your miracle?
Don't you know?
It was you.
Hey?
Aren't you going to say goodbye?
Bye.
Did you see her?
What did she say?
She said to tell you not to worry.
It's all going to be alright.
She's looking out for you
Come on!
Well it was fun while it lasted, eh?
Look there's no easy way to say this,
but I put a bit to one side, for me, to spend.
You can have it back.
Dorothy, six thousand, three hundred and ten euros.
All for the best, eh?
Dollars.
It's just a few grand.
Dad?
Ten really.
Eleven thousand, four hundred dollars.
I was going to tell you.
I sort of kept them by mistake.
Anthony.
I just enjoyed having a wedge.
It wasn't really the money. I just liked having it.
Four thousand, seven hundred and eighty euros.
Dorothy wanted a holiday of a lifetime.
Dad wanted to pay off all his credit cards.
Come on Dad.
Anthony wanted one game boy advanced xp.
One play station three. A Shogun new BMX bike.
A Rekia five hundred super quad bike.
Nimbus two thousand eltro-magnetic stair rider.
A table top candy floss maker. An iPOD, obviously.
An i B0T obviously.
And a stamp on it hydraulic rocket capable of
a attaining altitudes of over one hundred metres.
Three...
Two...
One...
That's how Anthony would want this story to end.
With big piles of stuff.
But it's not his story. It's mine.
Oh, regarde ca. Qu'est-ce-que c'est?
This is where I want it to end.